Sunday, July 19, 2020

Sometimes I just go and sit

I'm having one of those phases where I'm sad. Not for any one specific reason, though 2020 is enough all on its own. I'm melancholy. It's the type of time where you know if you could just have a gut-heaving cry, you'd probably feel better afterward. One of the side effects of the meds I am taking is that crying doesn't come as easily as it used to.

Knowing I was already sad, I decided to stop by and sit. Even though you can hear traffic, it's still SJ-level traffic and not that loud. Just the general sounds of a neighborhood around you. But the overall feeling is still one of peace and safety.


The paint on the front doors is peeling. There are pieces of shingles lying on the steps. Two of the stained glass windows have been boarded up, hopefully not because they were broken. I probably would have heard that if it had happened, though; word gets around in the Catholic community. The graveyard and shrine are still being looked after, likely by the school.

You can't go inside, but it wouldn't be the same anyway. The surviving church in our area took out anything of value. The pews were given to a church up north which had burned down but they're rebuilding. The organ found a new home.

From what I can tell, they're letting the rest of it crumble. I haven't heard any news on what they plan to do with it or the grounds, though I was told that the graveyard would be untouched. I'm not sure what I would hate more: watching it crumble, or watching it be demolished.

For now, it's still there, and it's still a place to find some peace when I need it.

1 comment:

John said...

I wonder what happened to all those plans they claimed to have about selling it or reusing it? Likely just hot air to get people to feel better about closing the church.

I'm still angry about the deception. It reminds me way too much of the City of Heroes debacle where the company closed down its profitable game in favor of unprofitable games that they liked more. No attempt to sell it to the eager buyers who offered; no attempt to give it away; no attempt to appease the game's players. The Catholic Church had a few people with an agenda and they go their way. I'm angry and bitter enough that I hope that it didn't make much of a difference. I hope that those churches that were failing didn't get enough of a boost from those who used to go to your church that they are still struggling financially.